My Journey:
How I Met My Partner, Bowie...
by Zay Canters and Bowie Stover
Date: March 29, 2017
Zay...
I met my partner, Bowie, in Whistler, BC, Canada when we were working at the Roundhouse Lodge on top of the mountain about 5 years ago. We were partying heaps back then, but only chatted a few times at work because we were so shy around each other (and probably hung over)! lol.
I had actually quit drinking alcohol for a month in December, because I had gotten my old job back, but was on my final warning because my pink slips got brought forward to the next season (someone obviously wanted me gone). So I thought I would quit drinking so I wouldn't pass out and sleep through my alarm and be late to work (which is why I had gotten my last pink slips). "Instead", I thought, "I'm going to take drugs!" so my plan worked, doing cocaine, pills, mdma, k and goodness knows what, for some reason I was able to wake up and still be high and extremely productive at work.
For some unknown reason after feeling quite proud that I had replaced my alcohol consumption to drugs (much cheaper as well), I decided to have an alcoholic beverage. "Just one" I thought.
Well, I was wrong. Many drinks later, one photo of me lying in the snow without my jacket (which was lost the next day), I woke up with my boss calling me, asking me where I am because I'm late to work!.... SHIT!
I get to work, get fired on the spot. I walk into the staff room to collect my things and Bowie is there, I tell them I'm fired and they hug me. I wanted to get to know them more and now I won't be working with them anymore, this makes me so sad.
Still drunk I storm out giving everyone the finger and break into tears on the way down the gondola. A minute later, I wipe them away, and think "Fuck it, I'll just do something else".
I don't know what happened next, but I'm pretty sure I grabbed some friends, went to the pub and got slaughtered.
The next few days, I checked my email and saw that in my drunken state I had bought tickets to Denver, Colorado and I have only a couple hundred dollars in my bank account. When did I book those? I must have been wasted!
I decided to leave my Whistler life behind and move to somewhere in Colorado. This is another story.
Bowie and I kept in touch on Facebook. Only every now and then. We both tied to chat only sometimes so we wouldn't let the other person know we were too keen on them. Just enough to be friendly... and cool.
In 2014, when I decided to quit drinking alcohol and start this blog, Bowie started training to become a Personal Trainer and an RKC kettlebell instructor. They also began to reduce their drinking and we started chatting more.
I would love to tell you more about Bowie's story but I will leave that up to them!
BECAUSE Bowie and I, after chatting so much on FB about quitting drinking, starting businesses and life, decided to meet up in person in Melbourne, Australia, where I live. After that week, Bowie and I decided to be together and start a new chapter of our lives as a fucking awesome couple!
So I want to welcome Bowie Stover to the page as an amazing sober samurai (I'll have to think of a better word for that, any suggestions?). I'll let Bowie share their story about overcoming the joys and non-joys of drinking and getting drunk!
Bowie will be here to help answer questions, blog and help out in any way.
WELCOME Bowie!! XXX
Bowie...
Hi Everyone, This is Bowie.
I know Zay introduced me a little while ago. I have been meaning to jump on and say a proper hello to you all earlier but now is better than never haha.
I have never really shared my story to anyone except Zay. After reading some of your stories I think I share similarities with so many of you.
I started drinking as a teenager, it became a daily habit before I knew it. I didn't go anywhere without drinking before or during whatever was happening, I didn't do anything sober.
Before I knew it 4 or 5 years had past and I honestly don't remember any of it. It was as though I woke up one day, I was overweight, unhealthy and sick all the time and working a dead end job just to fund my drinking. I hated my life but didn't feel like I was able to do anything unless I drank.
When I was 22 I quit drinking for the first time. I changed jobs, changed friends and tried my best to not think about drinking. I played sport but mostly I played a heap of video games and smoked a lot of weed. Not what I would call a constructive change. My health didn't improve and I ended up putting in even more weight.
After 2 years sober I eventually cracked and started drinking again, I was so unhappy I didn't feel like there was any point to not drinking when it made me feel good about myself and confident when talking to people.
I became even worse than before I quit. I met my ex gf who was just as bad as I was and together we partied, took drugs and generally made total jokes of ourselves. We moved to Canada together in 2011. In Canada I lived in Whistler. This is where I met Zay, we worked at the same restaurant together.
We never really spoke but partied together a few times before they left. I stayed in Canada until 2013. In that time I became so dependant on alcohol that by the end there was not a day I went to work that I wasn't drunk.
After coming back to Australia, I started playing roller derby. One of the girls on my team was a PT and offered me Kettlebell training. I went along, I was like a skeleton, I was weak and sick.
I wanted to be strong and look fit and be able to play derby really well.
After a month of training, my PT suggested I become a PT because she thought I would be a great coach. I signed myself the very next day.
With her help I trained every day, I stopped drinking completely, I spent time talking with Zay about my challenges and her challenges, I changed the way I thought about myself and what I could achieve.
It was challenging because my ex kept up the drinking and the parties. There were times when I slipped up and did drink again, I always hated myself after those nights, I felt like I had let myself down and I felt that by having to admit to Zay that I had been drinking that I was letting their belief in me down too.
My path has been very up and down. In 2015 I left my ex, she had become jealous of how I looked because I trained regularly and took care of myself while she didn't. I couldn't become the person I wanted to be while still being around that environment and honestly it was not what I wanted to be around. I was being judged for not drinking by all of the people in my life who did drink, because they couldn't understand my change.
I have been sober for 2 years now. I have never regretted my decision to change my life, even though at times it was so scary to have to believe in myself and trust myself. It has not been easy but I have found people who support me and my choices.
Thanks for letting me share my story and thank you all for being part of this amazing creation of Zay's.
They are one of the bravest and strongest people I have ever met. They helped me through some of the toughest times I have ever experienced. I don't even think they realise how much of an impact they has had on so many people by sharing their story.
Stay fearless!